Dimitri - part 1

I inhaled.

Acrid fumes filled my lungs as shards of thoughts began flooding my brain, pushing the oxygen out as they filled the space, all the space. The shards were too sharp to handle, too fast to comprehend, and my body was straining for air.

"Keep going."

I winced one eye open. When did I close them? My neck muscles clenched. I was still inhaling. Shards again. Crystals, heated, boiled. This was homemade. How much could I trust crystallised extract brewed over a kitchen fire? My neck muscles clenched again. They hadn't relaxed from the last one, but somehow, they had clenched again.

"Keep going."

Precious crystals. I wasn't going to stop any time soon. Then I felt a crack. The human jaw is powerful enough that you could break all of your teeth simply by gritting hard enough. Pressure sensing nerves at the root of your teeth were the only things sending out a panic signal to your brain, shrieking and clawing at your muscles to stop. My neck muscles jerked out another spasm, cracking all my vertebrae. They still hadn't relaxed once. Panic, perhaps. Shards glided by silently.

"Keep going."

Another spasm, another crack vibrated all the way through my jaw, assaulting my eardrum. My vision was blurry. Tears from what? I tried to show a smile but only managed to close my eyes again. 'So this is how I die.' Another jolt, another crunch.

"Keep going."

Tension. Will my bones break first or will my muscles snap under the strain? The bubbling of crystals forming a sticky liquid, dancing like a sick child in a fire. Muscles taut with no more room to tighten, just pulling apart with everything they had left. Visions, of cracks forming along my vertebral disks. Not enough oxygen to remember regrets. Inklings of emotions formed and instantly snuffed out by the crushing panic. The sensation of a bone about to break. "Leaking Marrow", two words that sprang to mind. Death wouldn't be grim and black and cold; death would be frenzied and red and messy.

I stopped inhaling.

Muscles instantly relaxed, dropping my head. I caught myself before I fell, grabbing the edge of the mattress hard. The fire was out, the child was dead, the shards stopped mid-air and froze in place. The world was hung in a pause, all momentum instantaneously lost. Oxygen deprivation tugged at my sleeve, and I remembered the second part of the breathing process.

I exhaled.